Thursday, April 7, 2011
When we're knocking at the door?
With a thousand million questions
About hate and death and war."
Micron Pens and Watercolors
On Illustration Board
I have a lot of questions on my mind lately. Like, when will my questions be answered? When will I understand why there's so much frustration and anger between parties.
The hate is what makes me want to just... give up. There's no reason for it. I don't even know anymore.
Why me? Why am I trapped in this spiral with the great wise Slender Man hovering over me day in and day out? Kelly says that it's something abou splitting. I don't know how I feel about that. Maybe I'm more comfortable with becoming like Him than I realized. That right there scares the living shit out of me though.
Why my parents? Why did my parents die? What did they do? Is it the whole fact that they just weren' in the safe haven? Or is there more to it than that? Thing hasn't been here. I've not seen It. Only Slendy's been here. And Todd. I like Todd. I like that he's here. I dunno. I feel safe. Though in the end it makes me worry about Bran. I want her to be safe.
I'm so confused right now. I don't feel like I've slept. I've got classes to deal with. Brennon's taking Dean and Candice to the school to sign up for the classes so they can finish this semester.
After my classes I'm making plans for the wake this weekend. Dean was saying something about birthday parties next weekend. I just want the stress to end and I want to relax and just... enjoy myself.
I don't know when that'll truly happen though... cause right now I just want to off myself.