Sunday, March 27, 2011

Ugh...

I'll be hapy. Happy to get the hell out of here. To start classes again. So restless. I want to get out and just run. Seriously considering walking to the park and just running through the field. It'd be fun.

I feel so helpless... and uncertain. And confused. And restless.

One thing I forgot to mention to Todd. Don't randomly show up at my college in the mask. You might get jumped. or laughed at. You'll fit in well enough with just your hoodie. Alo no appearing in the middle of classes unless it's my first one. Art History is such a load of bull. At lunch breaks Taben and I will walk the loop around the pond. We'll talk to you there. I'll be expecting you to meet up with us.I'm sorry I'm a noob at all f this. I'll get the hang of it just please be patient with me. I hope to be a better... whatevr you'd call me than you had before. Can't bring myself to say master... so don't have to call me that. I'm Aiden. just call me that.

And fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. How do we help Joce. There's got to be a way. Must be a way. Fucking fuck hell Fuck. I want to help. help help help.... How how how. Think think think. FUCK!

I should be able to put to use what I have. I should should should should. But I'm just a helpless thing. A helpless fucking pawn. Fuck fuck fcuk. No I'm not a pawn! I'm me. I'm Aiden.

Thank the Gods next week I start back to classes. I'll have something to do with myself. I'll be able to think. Think think think. Art art art.

What aboyut Ygg? I have to help Yggy. And Bran and Seth. Skyler. She still has Rat stalking her. Can't let Rat get her. Candice and Dean. What about them. Slendy Gods dammit! Gods dammit leave my siblings the fuck out of this!

I want to cry. I want to break down and cry. I want to be normal again. Normal. Normal...

I love you guys. I can't do this. Can't do this. I can't... I want to try and save you all. save save save.

But.





Who's going to save me....?

15 comments:

  1. Oh, there's a thought. "Who watches the watchmen?" The answer is, we all will, Aiden. All of us will save you.

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  2. Indeed. You've got us all. We won't let you fall.

    And if by chance you do, we'll be there to help pick you back up.

    Got it?

    Now take it easy on yourself.

    ~ Branwen

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  3. You're not giving yourself up, either, so don't even think about it.

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  4. What.

    No. I have no idea what he's talking about but if it's sacrificing yourself you can forget it.

    ~ Branwen

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  5. I know. I saw. I'm just juggling posts right now.

    Fox is pissed.

    ...I think he's already on his way.

    ~ Branwen

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  6. Quite alright, Gal. as long as he stays in the house he's safe. And if Rat comes in I'll be the blood shit out of him.

    ....once again.. Irony. P!ATD- Let's Kill Tonight....

    I'm glad you introduced me to them. they are so perfect for my moods lately.

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  7. Well if I'm here. I'll have Brenon and Taben down with him. I have a meeting with my dear ol' slender Da

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  8. It's such a nasty cycle isn't it? We'll save you.

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  9. He back. Still seething.

    Rat's not around you anywhere, in any case. Which means he's somewhere around the four of us.

    He's muttering about him being a selfish bastard...he's always been like that...never noticed it befo...oh he knows I'm listening to him now. Oops.

    Looks like he's going to wait for an update on where Rat is. Or to hear from Crow.

    Good luck up there. Be careful. Stay safe.

    ~ Branwen

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  10. I'm afraid Rat's going to do something to Fox. We do not want that. at all. But we can't leave any of you without protection or watching.

    And yeah. A vicious cycle. We'll get through it though. I... asked Him. To let Joce go. He.... He face palmed and left. Said He'd be back tomorrow for lessons. Oh... goody...

    Ygg, when you get a chance, come back. I hope everything's alright. I'm sorry about Nil. You know... we could always look together if you'd like... teach me how to do the stuff you can do.

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  11. Do not worry about me.

    I am simply removing the vermin.

    Rats are always getting caught in traps.

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  12. ....Well.. hello Fox... hello indeed.... Holy shit. Not what I had in mind in meands of communication but this could work.

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  13. Uhm... Someone last night when we were there was on the computer thing. He was showing me and Candy the blogs and stuff. We thought it'd be cool to help where we can.

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